Jeans and Sneakers

Last night was kind of rough. Rob told our roomate that his gf cannot live here anymore starting January. Good riddance to bad rubbish. Seriously. However, there was an argument between Rob and I, and it was all really stupid, but it got nasty for a minute. It was resolved before the night was over though.

Today brings good news!! Last night I sent my resume to a couple places on Craig’s list, and today I got two emails back asking me to call to set up an interview!! YAY! One is Friday, and the other is Tuesday. I went shopping today to get clothes for said interviews. I hate going shopping. It’s so hard to find styles I like that fit my frame correctly. I’ll post pictures once I take them, I’m not going to until I’m wearing them for the interviews, cause then I’ll have my makeup all done up too. I don’t do makeup on a daily basis anymore, because it’s not required of me.

I found the weirdest thing at walmart today. ( I know, walmart?!? I needed cheap trouser socks and some kind of snacky quick food to eat before my stomach ate itself. I got a slim jim.) Check this out!!

Ok, please don’t yell at me for liking pork rinds. I just told you I like slim jims too. What can I say?

They were $0.98, so I bought them. The hot and spicy ones. They were pretty tasty but Rob and the roomate got grossed out saying they smelled like burning flesh. Uhh. . .what did you guys think pork rinds were?

I spent a total of about 2.5 hours at the mall today, looking for clothes that fit (successfully), and looking for new dress up shoes/boots ( unsuccessfully). My hips hurt from walking so much. I’m freaking tired. I was supposed to come home and cook dinner after that, but I have the best boyfriend in the world, and when he saw how tired I was, he ordered Chinese. :]

It’s the second to last day of November. This year went by entirely too fast. Last night went by too fast too, I spent it playing World of Warcraft instead of doing anything productive. But I leveled up a bit!! :[

Well that’s not fair, I did get out to the craft store and got some yarn for my friend in CO, I’m knitting her a cool scarf, and I also got some items to make xmas presents for Rob’s family members. And blank cards. So I did something productive.

I was all out of it and sad for a lot of last week. . .I’m on birth control, and the hormones make me a little crazy sometimes, definitely make me over emotional sometimes. Last week I was convinced Rob didn’t want to spend any time with me anymore. We’re a funny couple, whenever we have to talk about something that we’re not comfortable talking about face to face, or if there’s the possibility of us yelling at eachother, we’ll get on AIM and talk about it. Sunday night I got up my nerve and messeged him on WOW, and told him, not to say that he was doing anything wrong, but he noticed I was weird last week, so to tell him that I felt like maybe he was getting bored with me or something.

Well. There was a particularly nice outcome of this convo, he definitely confirmed that he’s not getting bored with me, and is no where near doing so. I’m so glad he found me, he really is the most amazing person/boyfriend ever.

/mush.

I woke up this morning, tired as usual. But I remembered to grab my tea. When we went shopping on Friday for food for my 2nd turkey dinner, Rob bought me some Chai Tea, because I wanted it. I tried some when my sister got it once, when we were hanging out in the city, and liked it, so I figured maybe I’d try to switch to that from coffee in the morning, since coffee seems to burn through my stomach in the mornings. Anyway, I’m going off on tangents. I got pissed off this morning, because I had moved something stupid my roomate’s gf put in one of my cabinets, that really has no right to take up all the space it’s taking up. And when I went to grab my tea this morning, I noticed that she had moved it back.

Which made me think on the drive into work, about how I had told my roomate that I wanted us all to sit down and have a talk about this shit that’s been going on in my house, her staying with us for free, and giving us attitudes, and being a slob, not cleaning up after herself, and generally demanding respect in our house when she has no right to do so. And I thought about how my roomate basically brushed me off saying that I shouldn’t say anything to her yet, how he had to speak with her first, because anything I said to her would just make her upset, and would come back as her yelling at him. And I told him at that point, that that was his own damned fault. I told him that I had tried to prevent this whole thing from happening from the beginning, and he knew that. I had told him before she even stepped foot into our house that I didn’t want her living here, that I didn’t want her taking over my kitchen, and that’s exactly what happened, despite his promises that it wouldn’t.

Anyway, I started this morning off all pissed off because I thought about how I want to solve this problem in my house that I pay to live in, and he basically told me that I can’t, because it will come back as stress on him, and he doesn’t need that. Well what the hell, I’ve been stressed about it the whole friggin time, ever since she started staying in my house. But I guess my stress doesn’t matter to him. She needs to get the hell out of my house, and one way or another, I’m going to make sure that she does.

Everyone and their mother has off of work today. Except for me. If I had off of work, I wouldn’t get paid for it either, just like I didn’t get paid for yesterday. This job needs to go. Seriously, I’m missing out on sleep and extra money here.

Yesterday was nice and quiet, woke up around 2pm, (we were woken up several times in the morning though, our teenaged neighbors think they know how to build a shed, and keep hammering right next to our house, specifically, next to our bedroom. . . >:[ ) got all dressed and ready and went to dinner. It's a good thing I woke up hungry. It was a small gathering this year at Rob's grandma's house, just us and his parents. They didn't make pasta this year, but because of that, Rob's mom promised to make us meatballs on Sunday. . .I've been hearing about how amazing her meatballs are for like two years now, so we'll see. :]

We were home by 6:30 pm. Tried to watch Raging Bull, but got real bored with it, real quick, and swapped it halfway through for Mr. 3000. We’ve seen that already, but it was still amusing.

I have to go grocery shopping tonight for my turkey dinner tomorrow, and I have to stop by my mom’s to pick up the free turkey she has. I think Rob’s skeptical of her free turkey, last night he asked me how much a turkey costs. They’ll probably all be on sale now, so I don’t know, maybe I’ll just buy one if it’s more convenient (ie: don’t have to drive out to my mom’s.)

I’m jealous of everyone today who got to sleep in. It’s cold outside, so cold that I’m not even going to attempt to warm up my car for my daily lunch carnap. :[

At least it’s Friday. I don’t know that I’ll get all that much rest this weekend though, with the cooking tomorrow, and going to Rob’s parents on Sunday.

Anyone go shopping today and get any good deals? I’d not go anywhere near the malls even if I had off of work, and even if I’d gotten paid already (I’m still waiting for the direct deposit of my paycheck, that’s usually there by midnight Thursday night/Friday morning.)

I’m tired. Blah.

Edit: Oh yeah, I updated my site, I’m now having a sale, if anyone’s interested in getting a unique christmas present for someone, or for yourself. StatYous are $50.00 off now through Dec. 31st!!

I was in a pretty crummy mood when I left work today. Mostly because I’m super clingy this week and I knew my boyfriend would be home late, and partially because I’m constantly stressed out about what I’m going to do with my job and what not. But as I was driving home, I got stuck in traffic, and decided to turn on the radio (I seem to only put on the radio if I get stuck in traffic now. It’s weird. I used to have it on all the time, and now I only want it on when I’m bored in traffic.), and found a station that’s already playing non stop christmas music. WOO HOO!!

I’m not a big fan of what christmas has become, and that’s mostly why I write it with a lowercase c. Christmas is no longer about Christ, if it ever really was to begin with. . .I’m not going to go there. I ignore what I dislike about the holiday, and embrace the good will that some people actually do bring forward this time of year. Everyone hates christmas. It’s “cool” to hate christmas. Eff that, I love christmas. I love seeing people’s reactions to the presents I have found for them/have made for them. I love how even though most of the time families are grudging, during this time of the year, a lot of them come together and try to forgive and forget at least for a little while.

Anyway, so the music definitely brightened my mood. Even though some of the songs bring tears to my eyes (that’s just me basking in some musical beauty. . .I can’t help it, I grew up on Phantom of the Opera, of course I appreciate beautiful music), I felt better right away.

Last night I got an email from an aunt I have that I’ve never met. My dad said I should email her when I first made my website, because she’s an entrepeneur, and might have some good advice for me. Well, that was a couple of months ago, and I sent out the awkward email (uh. . . hi, this is Herb’s daughter, he said I should email you. . .), and didn’t really think about it after that. Well I forgot that they live in New Orleans, and they just got my email yesterday, since they had to evacuate for Katrina, and then when they came back they had to fix their house and try to get things in order. . .they only just checked their email.

How wonderful to hear from her though!! She sounds like a fantastically warm woman, and I wonder why I’ve never met her before. I just wrote her back today, and I hope she doesn’t mind. She asked me questions and I rambled on like my mom. (Kind of like I’m doing now, but you’re choosing to read my blog so haha on you!)

I’m also proud of myself today because I came home and put away the laundry, and cleaned out Turbo’s cage. Now I just have to decide if I’m going to eat anything tonight. It’s so yucky out, I don’t want to go get anything. :[

Edit: And my mom did call me today. I guess she’s feeling guilty. She called to ask me if there was anything wrong, because she said she felt like something was amiss when I left the house last night. And then she asked me if I was upset with her because I had to go out of my way to pick up my things from her house. I wonder if she’ll ever understand what she does to people.
Edit edit: I just read over what I wrote, and now I feel bad for giving my mother the cold shoulder around christmas time. You know what though? Even the nicest people need a break from those who won’t learn sometimes. :[

So, there’s been an ongoing thing with my mother, and it’s been really retarded. I don’t feel like reiterating the whole story all over again, so I’ll just say this much:
1. I’m tired of being a sometimes-friend for her, and having her ask me advice and tell me that I’m so wise one minute, and then having her do the exact opposite of what I advised her to do, only to have her come back and tell me I was right all along, and at the same time, her expecting me to help her fix the problem she just created.
2. I just finished moving the last of my belongings out of her house, so hopefully I won’t ever *need* to go back there.
3. I won’t be surprised if she calls me twice as frequently now.

I am suprised at how down this whole thing has got me though. I guess it’s just a hard blow when your family doesn’t come through for you.

It does feel good to have less belongings though. I still have a crap load of stuff here at the house, but at least it’s not all divided like it was before. I miss the days when I could roam the state with a bookbag. :[

On a totally different note, I’ve decided I want to create a three column template for this blog. And also, I went to see Harry Potter for free today. It was awesome, but now I’m sad because I have no idea when the next movie or book will come out. I am looking forward to seeing King Kong and Narnia though. There was some other CGI movie I saw previews for too, called Monster House that looks like it will be amusing.

It’s Sunday again, and I’m not looking forward to tomorrow. I should check craig’s list again before I go to bed. I’m about to watch Unleashed, so I’m gonna go.

So with the help of my multi talented, very intelligent boyfriend, I have changed the header background image to a photo of my feet. Also, I managed to keep the h1 text in the header, without displaying it, so that if need be, search engines can find it, while I saved the pretty font text in the header image itself.

What? Yeah, ok, so I took the image that this template’s stylesheet calls for, brought it into photoshop, replaced the blue area with a photo, added in some pretty font text, and voila!! Save new photo header, upload to the proper directory, change the image name in the header template file, go back to the stylesheet and change the h1 size to 0px, and also the description size to 0px, save or update files, and done!!

Over all though, I really haven’t learned anything new. I just replaced things that were already there. But I have an image now, and I’m going to try to design a whole new look and make my own template. God help me. It’s Friday, and the weekend stretches blissfully beyond me. Maybe I’ll actually get some work done.

Didn’t get much time to learn anything this weekend. . .Saturday I went to Queens to hang out with my sister. We were going to make duct tape dress forms, but ended up going yarn shopping and gathering supplies, by the time we got back home, we realized we didn’t have enough duct tape, and all the stores were closed.

Sunday I slept in and went to dinner at my bf’s parent’s house. It’s becoming Sunday tradition, and I don’t mind one bit!! We get a good homecooked meal with only the effort it takes to drive over there. Not too bad of a deal at all.

And now, with my yarn purchase, I’ve got three sweaters I want to make, and I don’t know how long they’re going to take. . .I’ll have to really try to prioritize to get some internet learning in.

The job search is ongoing. I replied to one ad yesterday that was actually in the town I live in, and I qualify for it, so hopefully they’ll like my resume and write back. Working in my town would seriously help, since I waste at least an hour getting back and forth to work every day, I’d have two extra hours to be at home, hopefully learning something.

I got a compliment from my coworker/supervisor guy at the job I have currently, yesterday. We were talking about what jobs I’m looking for and he basically said that with the knowledge I have now and how resourceful I am, I shouldn’t have any problem applying and getting an entry-level webmaster job for a simple site. Doesn’t sound like much, but it’s more than some people could handle, and that made me feel good. Especially since I tend to agree with him. I don’t know everything, but if I don’t know something and I need to, I have no problems figuring stuff out, or looking something up, and always as a last resort, asking someone.

I hate asking for help, but I’ve been known to do it from time to time.

I’m posting from work, and I shouldn’t be, but today is really slow, and I’ve got a little over 40 minutes until my lunch break, so. . .

I guess that’s all for now, I’ll try to update again soon.

I went to the library today with full intentions of getting some kind of webpage learning book type thing. I was looking for some kind of either HTML book or PHP book. . . something, anything to try to start to learn things. But once I got there, and found the right section, I was turned off by their selection of books which looked kind of dated. I know some stuff doesn’t change, but why get a hard copy book when the internet is a vast source of knowledge and information that’s likely more up to date, and you don’t have to carry it home?

Laziness. I guess. I didn’t get any webpage books. I did pick up three fiction books off of the free book rack though, which I’m sure will serve to further distract me from actually putting my mind to any learning in my free time, I’ll likely spend any free time I have reading now. And knitting.

I also went to the yarn store this weekend, with the original intention of getting a set of size US 11 needles, which I was lacking. I bought some fuzzy yarn at Target a couple of weekends ago, and had planned on making some scarves. The free pattern that came with the yarn called for size 11 needles. So I went to the store, got the needles, along with a book with hat patterns and two balls of yarn. They were bargain bin, I couldn’t resist.

I tried knitting the cheap fuzzy yarn I got from Target in the suggested free scarf pattern, and it wasn’t turning out too well. So now I have 8 balls of fuzzy yarn and size 11 needles that I can’t use together. Oh well. I’m sure the needles will come in handy for the future, and the yarn. . .well if I can’t find a use for it, I can always put it up for sale on ebay or something.

I’ve been looking for another job. I told my current job that I’m looking for another job, and now I need to find one soon, because they’re expecting me to put in my two weeks notice any day now. My only problem is I always have trouble finding another job, this time included. I guess I’m just stubborn, or something, because the main reason why I can’t find jobs easily is because I’m reluctant to apply to places, because I think either I’ll hate it, or I won’t fit in with the employees there. These opinions of mine have pretty much been based on every job I’ve had since I’ve moved back downstate. I don’t really fit into the whole “corporate” scene, and I hate doing sales. I’m pretty good at customer service, but I don’t like doing it when the customers get snotty (who does?), and most customer service jobs don’t pay very much.

I’m old enough to need more than your typical minimum wage to slightly higher paying job, and I’m too young (minded)/inexperienced/unschooled to get the higher paying more “professional” type jobs. I used to work in a corporate office, and whenever I could get away with it, I’d wear jeans under my skirts. That’s kind of what I mean.

So I’ve been trying to think of a way that I could start some kind of business, to support myself and not go insane working for people who don’t trust me to do what they’ve hired me to do, or don’t give me work at all hardly (much like my current situation). My first thought a while back was to try and make a business out of a skill, hence Twice on Tuesday. Although websites are tricky, you’ve got to get traffic to them for them to do anything for you. That might sound like an easy task, but it’s not. I’m not giving up on it, but I was never really sure if that’s how I wanted to make a living anyway, considering that once I actually had a paying customer, (before the website even, I got lucky!) I was nervous throughout the entire process, hoping like hell he’d like the finished product, and worrying that he’d get it and think that he’d paid too much for what I’d produced. Likeness is a perspective thing I think, and that’s risky to build your business off of.

Lately I’ve been noticing a lot of empty store fronts for rent. I can’t help but see all that space and the lovely empty windows and wonder what I could do with them. I think I’d love having my own store. And lately the daydream has been of a yarn store.

There’s a bunch of reasons why that wouldn’t necessarily work for me, considering I’ve only just learned to knit within the past 12 months, and although what I’ve made is pretty impressive considering my lack of experience, (Check out my first knitting project ever!) I hardly know all the different kinds of yarns, and needles, and patterns, and god knows what else out there that I’d need to know to open up a yarn store.

But I still think it would be really cool to try, so I think I’m going to attempt to write up a business plan for a yarn store. God only knows if I’ll actually finish the business plan, let alone get to the actually opening a store part, but it’s something to think about, and do, and get motivated by.

And in the meantime, I’ll keep looking for jobs I know I won’t want to keep very long, cause I’ve got to pay the bills. :[